


So...You're Cheating On Me With Church?

by bluemoongirl99



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Canon Divergence, Catholic, Catholic Church - Freeform, Catholicism, Confessions, Derek's an alpha, Established Relationship, For reasons, Future Fic, I think I got everything, M/M, Pregnant Allison Argent, Religion, Stiles Thinks Derek is Cheating, Talks of Religion, aetheist, allison and scott are married, but also non religious?, church, derek likes to go to church, i don't know what season it's after nothing's really mentioned, i love them, i mean kate and paige are mentioned briefly, it's all kind of a mess, sterek, talk of dead moms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2019-02-07 22:42:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12851085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluemoongirl99/pseuds/bluemoongirl99
Summary: Derek likes to go to church. Every Sunday at nine o’clock sharp he pulls his car over to Montgomery Parkway, and parks it into the overflowing lot behind St. Timothy’s Catholic Church, for the 9:15 mass service. He sits in a pew in the back, and doesn’t talk to anyone. He doesn’t belong to any of the groups the church has, even though he’s subscribed to their email list after one weekend when he drove all the way out to find that the service was cancelled due to a pipe bursting a few days previous. He sits through the entire service, and then when it’s over he gets back into his car, and drives back home.It’s not even that big of a deal, except for the fact that Stiles doesn’t know. Nobody knows.Derek and Stiles are in a committed relationship, and Derek likes to go to Church, but he's worried that Stiles won't understand that he likes to go for non-religious reasons, and he fails at communicating and feelings.





	So...You're Cheating On Me With Church?

**Author's Note:**

> So I was super into Teen Wolf when I was like 13 and 14, and read a ton of Sterek when I was 14. It figures that years later when I'm 18 is when I publish my first Sterek fic. I've also gotten super into Teen Wolf again now that's it's over? I don't understand my brain. Oh well. First and fore most, I'm super emo, so if you wanna check out any of my super emo bandom fics then be my guest! 
> 
> I'm currently working on a longer amnesia Sterek fic, but who knows how long that'll take me to publish considering I'm basically working full time, and going to school full time. Life is great! Anyways, I hope you enjoy this and please, please, please leave me some comments!
> 
> Background info: Stiles is 22, Derek is 28. They live together, Stiles is working on his dissertation for college at Berkley. Allison and Scott are married and have been married for a year, and are expecting their first child! I think that's all you need to know. If you have any questions just lemme know in the comments!

Derek likes to go to church. Every Sunday at nine o’clock sharp he pulls his car over to Montgomery Parkway, and parks it into the overflowing lot behind St. Timothy’s Catholic Church, for the 9:15 mass service. He sits in a pew in the back, and doesn’t talk to anyone. He doesn’t belong to any of the groups the church has, even though he’s subscribed to their email list after one weekend when he drove all the way out to find that the service was cancelled due to a pipe bursting a few days previous. He sits through the entire service, and then when it’s over he gets back into his car, and drives back home. 

It’s not even that big of a deal, except for the fact that Stiles doesn’t know. Nobody knows. 

He doesn’t mean to keep it as a secret. He had been meaning to mention it to Stiles for a while, but every time he opened his mouth the words would catch in his throat. He didn’t know how to explain it to Stiles, and he didn’t want Stiles to assume that he was suddenly religious, because he wasn’t. He didn’t find Jesus, or anything as equally ridiculous. 

He didn’t know how to explain to Stiles that going to mass reminded him of when he was kid. It reminded him of when his whole family would get together on Sundays and would have big dinners, and their house would be filled with noise. It gave him a sense of community that he hadn’t truly felt since he was apart of a big pack, and all the voices chanting, and the ritualistic aspect reminded him of how his whole family would hold hands and thank the moon before every dinner. 

Going to church made him feel closer to his Mom, Laura, and the rest of the people he had lost. 

He would go to confessionals too. 

Not every Sunday, at least, not anymore. But there was a relief in telling an outside person of everything he’d done, or well, a human tailored version of events. Every time the priest told him that none of it was his fault, and that there was a plan for everyone, it sent a rush of calm throughout his entire body. It sucked, and it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that Paige died so young. It wasn’t fair that Kate had used him to kill his entire family, but, it made him feel at peace when entertaining the thought that maybe there really wasn’t _anything_ he could have done. 

But most of all? Church made him feel more human. He wasn’t angry anymore. He doesn’t feel that rage, that he had gotten so used to after the fire, sitting in its usual spot at the pit of his stomach. He felt lighter. He felt more whole. 

Now, all of that wasn’t directly related to the Church. It was probably a winning combination of having a new pack, having Stiles in his life, and having time to heal. But, going to Church helped. 

And that’s the problem. He doesn’t know how to say all of that to Stiles without it coming across as ridiculous. He knows Stiles is an atheist. He practically puts it on blast anytime that he can. Not that Derek minds. Everyone’s entitled to their own beliefs, and he knows that Stiles stopped believing in God after his Mom died. Stiles has every right to be angry at the world, and insist that any God would have taken his Mom away doesn’t deserve to be believed in. That’s perfectly fine. 

Derek just doesn’t know how to look him in the eye and tell him that he does believe in God. He doesn’t know how to tell him that going to Church every Sunday has been the only thing that’s made him better; that’s kept him from going on suicide missions, secretly hoping that he wouldn’t come back. 

But mostly, he doesn’t want Stiles to look at him like he doesn’t know him anymore. 

Because the Derek Hale that Stiles knows, hell, the Derek Hale that everybody knows doesn’t go to Church. So, that’s Derek Hale’s dirty little secret: he goes to Church. 

\- -  
\- -

Normally Stiles loves Sundays. They’re great. He doesn’t have to do anything usually, so he sleeps in. Sometimes him and Derek go out in the evening, but most of the time they stay in and watch a movie, or go through their DVR of crappy reality TV. Derek rolls his eyes and pretends to hate it but Stiles knows the truth. He knows Derek was just as upset about who won the Bachelor last season as he was. 

Because his Sundays are normally so awesome, that’s why this one particularly sucked. He was up at the crack of dawn. Okay, maybe not the _crack_ , but nine o’clock was entirely too early to be awake. 

Why was he awake this early on a Sunday, you may ask? He needed to talk to Dr. Euenge, as well as take notes from him for his thesis, and the only time it worked with the time difference was bright and early on a Sunday morning. He was a little bitter, okay, a lot bitter, but he had practically shit his pants when Dr. Euenge responded to one of his emails saying that she would be happy to help, so he had no room to complain. 

Dr. Euenge was amazing, and was currently in Tokyo assisting one of her colleagues in curating a new exhibit in the Edo-Tokyo Museum of History. Her section was on Medieval Mythology, which she was an expert in. Stiles’s thesis was on Medieval Mythology, its roots, along with its ties and applications to modern pop culture. It was the closest he could to actually getting his doctorate in Werewolves, and Werewolf History. 

Stiles didn’t want to come across as tired during the video session. He also wanted to pull all of his other notes and questions together so he could be organized, and get the most out of the one session, even though Dr. Euenge has insisted that Stiles could video chat with her, schedules permitting of course, as much as he needed to gather information, and sources for his thesis. 

When he got up and took a shower, he could feel Derek’s surprise. He wanted to snicker. Yeah, he was a little addicted to his bed and sleeping in, but he did have the ability to get up early when needed. 

Derek didn’t really say much about Stiles being up. He left with a brief peck to Stiles’s lips, and a mumble about going to the gym. Stiles didn’t think much of it. Derek went to the gym every Sunday morning. In fact, he found it a little unnerving how Derek could get up early, and _then_ want to work out on top of it. Whatever, it was probably a wolf thing. 

After having a cup of coffee, Stiles figures he should start pulling up all of his notes, and the beginnings of a first draft of his thesis. He still had a good hour and a half before his video session with Dr. Euenge, but he wanted to be prepared. That was when he noticed that Derek had left his iPod. 

Stiles paused. The iPod was sitting on the dresser next to Derek’s side of the bed. It still had the earbud cord wrapped haphazardly around it. Stiles was going to move on, but then he remembered how much it sucked whenever he forgot his iPod when he went to the library to study. He pulled his lip back with his teeth, and checked the time. If he drove all the way to the gym and back he would still have time to prepare his notes. Plus, he reasoned, driving around for a little bit would probably clear his head enough so that he wouldn’t be as scattered.

Stiles grabbed the iPod, and climbed into his Jeep. He tossed the iPod onto the passenger seat and headed out. He did mutter to himself at least once about how great of a boyfriend he was. He was such a good boyfriend he deserved sonnets written about him. He would surely tell Derek that as soon as he hand-delivered him his iPod. 

Once he parked, he tried to find Derek’s obnoxious Camaro in the parking lot, but couldn’t. He rolled his eyes, he probably parked in the back because Derek’s allergic to going through front doors like a normal person. 

As soon as he walked in he saw Jim at the front desk. Stiles knew most of the people who worked there, not because he went very often, but by association with Derek. Derek was there so often he was practically a stockholder. 

Jim recognized him instantly, but seemed a little surprised to see him. Stiles could understand that, it was rare to see an awake Stiles before noon, and also walking into a gym willingly nonetheless. 

Stiles gave him a bright smile, and walked up to the desk. “Hey!” He greeted warmly. “Derek left his iPod at home, so I figured I’d be the best boyfriend ever and drop it off. Is he in the weight room?” 

Jim’s expression only got more confused though at Stiles’s words. “I think you got the days mixed up, Derek isn’t here.” Now it was Stiles’s turn to be confused. “It’s Sunday morning.” Jim continued. “Derek’s never here on a Sunday morning, ever.” 

Stiles felt something in his stomach drop. “Right.” He heard himself say, though he couldn’t really feel his lips moving. “Silly me, I forgot it was Sunday.” He made himself laugh, but it sounded hollow and wrong. He managed to give Jim a half-wave and nod as he walked out of the doors and went back to his Jeep. 

He had heard Derek say that he was going to gym. He knew he did. Derek went to the gym every Sunday morning. He tried to wrack his brain for a time that he hadn’t, and felt something cold and tight twist in his chest when he realized he couldn’t. It was a constant. Stiles would sleep in, and Derek would go to the gym. 

He tried to think of something logical that Derek would be doing every Sunday morning, but he couldn’t think of anything. He tried to think of any possibility except for the one that the back of his brain was screeching at him. But Derek wouldn’t. Derek would never-

But every Sunday morning he tells Stiles that he’s going to the gym, then he comes home and takes a shower- 

Oh god. Stiles couldn’t remember a time that he didn’t come home and shower after going to the gym on Sundays. But Stiles didn’t question it because he had come from the gym, of course he would want a shower. But now…

Stiles felt his heart in his stomach as everything started clicking together. The worst part is that Sundays were normally the days that Derek looked the happiest. Sunday nights were when he would normally surprise Stiles with flowers, or take him out to eat, or to a movie. Of course Stiles had noticed that he always looked lighter on Sundays. His smiles were brighter. But Stiles had always assumed it was connected to getting a good workout. But Derek went to the gym nearly everyday, why would Sundays be any different? Unless-

Stiles felt sick. He drove back to their apartment completely numb, and felt like he was going to throw up. He gathered all of his research notes in a fog, and tried to stop his hands from shaking. He would think about Derek later. Right now, he needed to focus on his thesis. 

Though, he must have looked like death warmed over because as soon as Dr. Euenge greeted him, he gave her a weak smile, and she asked what was wrong, with her usual clipped british accent. 

At her inquiry he felt as if the small balloon inside of him that was keeping him going, deflated. He blew out a breath and refused to look at the camera for a few seconds. “I think,” he started, then sighed in resignation. “I think my boyfriend is cheating on me.” Out loud it sounded ridiculous, but he couldn’t help it. It made sense. He made so much sense he felt stupid. 

Dr. Euenge pressed her lips together. “I’m sorry Mr. Stilinski. I wish I had advice to give, but I don’t think any of my knowledge holds the cure to heartbreak.” 

Stiles managed a small smile. “It’s alright. Let’s focus on the point of this video session anyway, I don’t want to waste your time.” 

They continued the session, and Stiles was happy with the amount of information, and sources he was able to pull from her. He also worked through the credibility, and jumble of information he had already compiled, making sure it flowed, and all correlated. She suggested a few areas to focus more on, and which points to expand, and other ones to pull back on. 

She caught on quickly to his fascination with werewolves, and how majority of his research was on them in particular. She pointed it out with an impish grin, and told him that maybe he should focus on werewolves, instead of mythology in broad. Stiles agreed, but defended his choice in that with him being picky, he was too scared of running out of materials with werewolves, but would have much more other areas to divert to in that case if he focused on mythology as a whole. 

He tried to think about werewolves objectively, to get his mind off of his boyfriend. But it was hard when most of the conversation had to do with such a big part of his life. When the session finally ended and Dr. Euenge wished him well with not only his paper, but his love life, he shut his laptop and stared at the wall in their living room. 

The walls felt like they were closing in, and like he couldn’t breathe. He felt like such an idiot. Sure, a part of him had always been waiting for the other shoe to drop. Derek was out of his league, was older, and could have anybody. Stiles knew that, but he never thought it would sting so much. He loved Derek. 

He thought about calling his Dad, but he didn’t even know what he would say. He didn’t know anything for sure, and everything felt wrong and twisted. He debated calling Scott, but Scott was pack, and he didn’t want to put him in a difficult position with Derek. He loved Lydia, but he didn’t think he could deal with her at the moment. She’d get angry, and righteous, and Stiles didn’t want to tear all of Derek’s clothes up, he just wanted the feeling in his stomach to go away.

After a few minutes of deliberation he decided to call Allison. Yes she was living with Scott, and she was technically pack, but she seemed like the only person Stiles could handle, and the whole obeying the Alpha instinct didn’t really apply to humans the same way. 

Thankfully, she picked up. “Hey Stiles! What’s up?”

Stiles didn’t say anything. His throat felt dry, and the words he needed to say felt like acid on his tongue. 

“Hello?” Allison said uncertainly. “Are you there?”

“I think Derek’s cheating on me.” He finally got out. His voice sounded broken, and he hated it. 

“Stiles, what happened?” Allison asked. She seemed completely caught off guard.

Once Stiles started talking he felt like he couldn’t stop. He told her about going to gym, and finding that Derek wasn’t there. He told her all about Sundays, and how happy Derek usually is, and how lately he’ll look at Stiles like he wants to say something. He’ll even open his mouth, then he’ll stop, like he’s changed his mind. Stiles never thought anything of it, like it was something stupid. Like Derek deciding that grocery shopping could be put off for another day, or he’d already figured out the answer to the question he was going to ask. 

When he finally finished his throat feels raw, and he realizes that he’d been crying. He hadn’t even noticed it, but his face was wet, and he wiped at it angrily with the corner of his hoodie sleeve. 

“Oh honey.” Allison said on the other line. She sounded sad, and for some reason it made Stiles feel worse. “Why don’t you pack a bag?” She suggested, gently. “You can stay here as long as you want, all I ask is that you give occasional foot rubs when Scott’s not around, or pretends to be too tired.” 

“I never would deny a pregnant lady foot rubs.” Stiles told her. He attempts to go for a joking tone, but it falls short. 

“It’ll all be okay, honey.” She assured him. 

“Have I ever said I love you? Because I love you, Allison McCall.” 

Stiles hears her laugh. “I think you said that exact sentence, drunkenly, at my wedding reception.” Then her tone turns somber. “Pack your bag so you can get over here and I can give you a big hug.” 

Stiles sniffled, but followed her directions. He goes up to his bedroom with Derek, steels himself, then starts packing a bag. He only gets about halfway through when he hears the front door opening. He stiffens, but keeps packing. 

“Stiles?” He heard Derek’s voice ask from downstairs. 

Stiles doesn’t answer, but Derek comes up upstairs anyway. All the hairs on the back of his neck stand up as he feels Derek come closer, until he’s standing in the doorway. There’s a moment of silence, and Stiles still has his back to Derek. 

“Stiles?” He asked again, but this time it feels like a cut because he sounded concerned. “What happened. What’s wrong?” 

“You forgot your iPod.” Stiles eventually settles on saying. “So I went to the gym to bring it to you. You weren’t there.” He said flatly, and picks at a string loose on the handle of the bag. “Apparently you’re never there on Sundays. You’ve never been to the gym on a Sunday.” 

Derek doesn’t say anything. That’s what hurts the most. He doesn’t say _anything_. 

Stiles finally turns around. Derek’s in his usual tank top and basketball shorts. Stiles fucking hates how he still finds him attractive. He still looks beautiful, and Stiles still wants to kiss him. He still wants to sit on the couch with him, and feel his arms wrap around him. He still wants to see him smile, and he hates it. 

“So, how long have you been cheating on me?” He asked, because the question has been burning at him. How long has Derek been with someone else? 

Of all the reactions he expected, the last one he expected was for Derek to look so hurt, and angry. “You think I’m cheating on you?” He asked incredulously.

Stiles opened his mouth to defend his reasoning, but before he could Derek had already used his super-wolf speed and had him pinned against the wall. “You think I could cheat on you? You think I would ever cheat on you?” Derek demanded, his eyes flashing red. 

Stiles’s head was a mess and he didn’t know what to think. “What are you doing then!?” he yelled.

At that Derek’s eyes faded back to their normal green as he pulled away from Stiles. His face hardened into his patented glare, but it was directed at the floor. “Where do you go every Sunday?” Stiles asked, his voice small and quiet. 

“I like to go to church.” Derek said after a moment. His tone was low.

“What?” Stiles spluttered. 

Derek wouldn’t meet his eyes. “I like to go to church, okay? Can we just drop it.” 

“You honestly don’t expect me to believe that.” Stiles hedged, sounding dubious. “Why would you go to church? I just don’t get it.” 

“We know you don’t get it. I’m sure everyone on the planet knows how much of an atheist you are.” Derek snapped, his eyes flickered red, but for only a moment. 

“If it was just that then why would you keep it a secret from me? Why would you be hiding the fact that you go to church?” 

“Gee, Stiles.” Derek scoffed. “Maybe because any time we watch a movie, or a tv show and somebody prays you laugh at how stupid they are. Or maybe it’s because you like to turn everything into a joke.” 

Then it dawned on him, and he felt horrified. His entire body felt cold. “You thought I would make fun of you.” It wasn’t a question. It was a realization. WIthin seconds he was flinging himself at Derek, and wrapping his arms around his neck. “I’m so sorry.” He choked out. “Baby, you can go to church. I would never make fun of you for that.”

Derek’s hand came up and started rubbing his back. “It’s okay,” he told him quietly. 

“No it’s not!” Stiles sobbed. “My boyfriend was so scared of me making fun of him that he didn’t feel safe enough to tell me that he goes to church. I’m a horrible boyfriend!

Derek sighed. “It’s not just that.” He conceded. “I didn’t know how to explain why to you, when I don’t really know why myself.” He admitted. 

Stiles brought his hand up, and cupped Derek’s cheek. Derek leaned into it instinctively. Stiles swiped his thumb of Derek’s cheekbone. “Is Church why you’re always happy on Sundays?” He asked softly.

“Yeah.” Derek replied, equally as soft. 

“Then that’s all I need to know.” Stiles told him, before tilting his mouth up and kissing him. 

\- -  
\- - 

Later that night Derek tries to explain to Stiles how church makes him feel. How it gives him a sense of community again, and makes him feel light. He tells him how he doesn’t feel as broken or twisted inside. He tells him how it’s made him find God in everyday things. Like, in having a pack again, and getting to have a life with Stiles. He also tells Stiles when he’s fucking him that night that he never feels closer to God than he does right then, with Stiles spread out before him, his pale skin nearly glowing from the light of their bedroom lamp, and his mouth open, with short, quick gasps coming out. Stiles laughs at him, but it’s quickly cut off by a moan. 

Afterwards, he admits that it makes him feel closer to his Mom, and closer to Laura. Like maybe they did go to a better place. Stiles kisses his collar bones and admits himself that he hopes heaven exists, just for his Mom too. 

\- -  
\- -

Even after everything, it still comes as a surprise that on the following Sunday morning, when Derek gets up for Church, so does Stiles. 

Derek tells him delicately that while he appreciates the support, he’d rather go alone than with someone who doesn’t care and isn’t going to take it seriously. To which Stiles had replied with: “If it’s important to you, then it’s important to me. You’re not going to be alone anymore, not while I’m around anyway.” Which Derek really couldn’t find an argument too. 

So Derek, at nine o’clock sharp pulled his car around Montgomery Parkway, and parked in the overflowing parking lot surrounding St. Timothy’s Catholic Church. But this time with Stiles chattering on about his parking job, and maybe leaving earlier next time to avoid the crowd of people. Derek only let him get as far as talking about the Contemporary Service they had every third Sunday of the month at eleven am that he had researched about, before he was kissing him hard on the mouth. 

“I”m glad you’re here.” Derek said, after he pulled away. 

Stiles looked a little dazed, but he smiled back. “I’m glad I’m here too.” 

Even though they got a lot of judgmental looks from the congregation as they sat down, Derek felt even more at peace as the service started, and Stiles grabbed his hand. As the service went on, Stiles drooped more and more until he had fallen asleep, with his head on Derek’s shoulder. 

When the service ended, he woke up Stiles’s gently. Stiles blinked owlishly, before he realized it was over. He glanced over at Derek and looked so sad, it made Derek’s heart stop before he said, “I missed it,” unhappily. “I fell asleep!” 

Derek kissed his forehead, briefly, mindful of the congregation that was slowly petering out. Most of the people had left before he wrangled a sleepy Stiles up, and out to the car. Stiles was still going on about missing half the service, so Derek squeezed his hand. “You were here.” He told him earnestly. “That’s all that matters.” 

“Next week, we’re leaving at eight, so we can get coffee and donuts on the way.” Stiles informed him in between yawns. 

“Next week?” Derek parroted. 

Stiles gave him a look. “You aren’t getting rid of me that easily.” 

Derek could only smile as he pulled out of his parking space. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” 

\- -  
\- -

A few days later on Wednesday when Stiles is out late with his study group, Derek goes to confession. 

“Well, you know the Church’s stance on gay relationships.” The Priest reminds Derek cryptically, before Derek can get a word in. “But,” he concedes. “It’s nice seeing a member of my congregation not be as alone. I’d keep him around.” 

“I plan to.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr: babyashleym  
> and twitter!: @iamashleymoon


End file.
